Self-care is never asking your friends if you’re a good person. Tell by my hair which is getting softer with the estradiol. If they could tell im good just by my shirt and how pointedly devoid of logo’s it is. I want to ask them over and over if I am a good person. My therapist should be more of a friend, I think. Self-care is removing the spiky collar for five minutes in the bathroom before returning to the party. Is this the best use of our time? They ask. I show them a Wiki How-To on properly filming your bath bomb to post to Instagram. More time and energy and thought than your little ASMR videos would have you believe. Self-care takes time and energy, my therapist says.

“Oh!” I say to myself 19 videos in, “so you gotta twist the hair”.

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